Top Ten Michael Vick Excuses
10)"House came with a dogfighting pit, and it seemed like a shame to waste it"
9)"Wanted to distract the public from crooked NBA referees and cheating baseball players"
8)"Judgment was impaired by playing with lead-based Chinese toys"
7)"I was training the dogs to...uhhhhhh...get Osama"
6)"Always wanted to be quarterback for a prison team, like in 'The Longest Yard'"
5)"Steroids made me all crazy"
4)"Eddie Brill told me I needed something big to close on"
3)"Oh like you've never run an illegal dogfighting ring"
2)"Thought I could get out of it by buying Kobe Bryant's wife a diamond"
1)"Fights weren't worse than what you see on 'The View'"
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