The Lingerie Football League, the publicity stunt you might have seen on pay-per-view during a recent Super Bowl halftime show, is taking its bras, panties, and straps to the gridiron for real, forming a league set to premiere in September 2009. Tryouts took place in Seattle this past week and Mitchell Mortaza, founder of LFL, said the reason games won't begin for a year is because they were looking for the hotties at first, and will now try to instill in them some actual football skills to go along with the flowing hair and potential perky enhancements.
League play won't start until next September, partly because football skill isn't a requirement. The tryout at Green Lake Field was more about testing athletic ability and gauging beauty.
"Yeah, it's sexy, but that just draws the viewers," said founder Mortaza, 34, of West Hollywood. "You've got to keep them, and the fan base has to respect it. Because of that, you're going to see girls that are beautiful, but athletic, and take it seriously."
Vince McMahon, did you hear that? You actually need skill to carry a league. A novel concept, I suppose.
The league will be comprised of 10 teams, all with names that look derived from a Spearmint Rhino timesheet. We enjoy games with the L.A. Temptations, New York Euphoria, Dallas Desire, Chicago Bliss, Atlanta Steam, Seattle Mist, Miami Caliente, San Diego Seduction, Tampa Breeze, and Phoenix Crotch Scorch. I just keep imagining what these mascots will look like. How do you truly personify a "Seduction"? And I don't even want to know how they're going about the Steam.
One of the participants, a 23-year-old from Tacoma, Wash., said she believes there is a big enough demographic that it shouldn't have a problem gaining fans. Obviously she's been introduced to that sneaky demographic called "men."
"I'm willing to show some skin in the name of football," said Alicia McLaughlin. "I feel like it's my true calling. And there's going to be haters, people scoffing at it, but there's a big enough demographic that it shouldn't have any problems creating a fan base."
Wow, sure beats the "true calling" story my last four girlfriends have told me about moving away and not having a cell phone. Seriously, what are the chances?
According to Mortaza, the players will make $40,000 a year, which really is going to be a huge pay cut for the majority of these ladies, who undoubtedly come from big law firms and investment brokerage firms.