LETTERMAN'S TOP 10 "MICHAEL VICK EXCUSES"

Top Ten Michael Vick Excuses
Top Ten

10)"House came with a dogfighting pit, and it seemed like a shame to waste it"

9)"Wanted to distract the public from crooked NBA referees and cheating baseball players"

8)"Judgment was impaired by playing with lead-based Chinese toys"

7)"I was training the dogs to...uhhhhhh...get Osama"

6)"Always wanted to be quarterback for a prison team, like in 'The Longest Yard'"

5)"Steroids made me all crazy"

4)"Eddie Brill told me I needed something big to close on"

3)"Oh like you've never run an illegal dogfighting ring"

2)"Thought I could get out of it by buying Kobe Bryant's wife a diamond"

1)"Fights weren't worse than what you see on 'The View'"